Month: September 2017

Time Flies

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“I’m going to the grocery store,” Mother said. “I made a list, so I won’t be gone long. Use your time wisely. Past is in charge.” And then, she left.

Present and Future looked across the table at their sister. “Why are you always in charge?” Present asked.

“Because I’m the oldest and most responsible,” Past said.

“You haven’t done anything responsible lately,” Present said.

“I did my homework an hour ago,” Past said.

“Like I said,” Present said.

“Did you do your homework?” Past asked.

“I’m working on it,” Present said. “Future hasn’t even started hers.”

“I’ll do it later. It’ll be fine,” Future said.

“I still say it’s not fair,” Present said. “Oh hey, look at that squirrel!” Present jumped up and ran to the window. “Let’s build a squirrel feeder so we can see cute squirrels all the time. Let’s build a giant squirrel feeder and feed all the squirrels in the city. Or the world.”

“I can see it now,” Future said. “We’ll be invaded by rats carrying a resistant strain of the bubonic plague. It will take twenty years to find the cure, but the world will be so devastated that we’ll have five years of peace.” Future had a dreamy look on her face. “World peace, doesn’t it sound marvelous? I’m sure it would be worth two decades of pain and suffering.”

Present made a face. “I don’t want a squirrel feeder after all.”

“Look what you’ve done,” Past whispered to Future. “That’s the same face she made when you told her that if she took ballet class she’d fall off the stage during her first performance.   Now she’s going to sing sad pop songs at the top of her voice.”

Present took a deep breath. “Unbreak my heart…” she sang loudly.

“Hey, maybe we could make cookies later,” Future said.

“See, I just drew a dog in a funny hat,” Past said. “What was I thinking?”

Present stopped singing. “Cookies?   A funny dog?” She held out a hand for the scrap of paper that Past had scribbled on. She turned the paper sideways and upside down. “Are you sure this is a dog in a hat? I think that maybe it’s a flamingo on a motorcycle. Hey, let’s go ride bikes!”

“Pass. Last time you forgot you had brakes and ran into me. It hurt,” Past said.

“Why do you always remember the bad stuff?” Present asked. “The glass is half full.”

Past frowned. “If it’s half full, it’s probably because you drank half. Wait a moment. You did!   Drink your own orange juice and leave mine alone.”

“I like orange juice,” Present said. She held up her spoon and let milk dribble back into her cereal bowl.   “But I don’t like when the cereal gets mushy. Do you want it?”

“You’ll get hungry later if you don’t eat it,” Future said.

“But I don’t want it,” Present said.

“I ate all my cereal, and that’s all the cereal I wanted,” Past said. “I wanted all my juice, too.” She picked up her cup when Present reached for it and drank it quickly.

“We’re all done! Let’s ride bikes,” Present said.

“You didn’t finish your homework,” Past said. “Plus Mother said we’re not supposed to go out while she’s gone.”

“You’re boring,” Present said. She smacked her spoon into her bowl, and milk splattered on the table.

“You should clean that up,” Future said. “Mom will be here soon.”

“Cleaning up is boring,” Present said.

Future reached a hand across the table to Past. “I’ll put the bowls in the sink if you will help me with my homework.”

Past stacked her dishes and put them into the waiting hand. “I finished mine so I have time to help,” she said.

“Help me, too,” Present said.

Just then, Mother came in. “I’m home.   Did you use your time wisely?” she asked. “What did you do?”

“We sat at the table and talked,” Past said.

“Past is going to help me with my homework,” Future said.

“I’m bored and I hate mushy cereal,” Present said.

“That’s great girls,” Mother said. “Why don’t you pause and help me put away the groceries. Present, you need to wipe up the milk first.”

“Hey! Let’s go buy a self-cleaning table instead. Right now.   I’ll drive,” Present said.

“You don’t know how to drive. Clean up the mess you made, it will teach you patience,” Mother said.

“Patience is boring,” Present said. But she cleaned up the mess while her sisters put the groceries away.

High Fashion

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The famous designer was hidden from the audience by a heavy, tasseled curtain.   The host ran a hand though his green spiked hair and smiled widely. “Madame Chaussure, please tell us a little bit about your fall collection,” the host said. He held the microphone up to the curtain.

Madame Chaussure spoke in a high-pitched, raspy voice through the curtain.   “Darling, my collection is all about growing up. Children dress up in high heels and power suits as though they were wearing symbols of responsibility and talent. Bah, anybody could balance their weight on three-inch heels or tie a half-windsor.   Fashion has to be earned.”

The host looked down at his lavender tie and well-cut charcoal pin-striped suit. “Right,” he said. “I’m looking forward to your vision of fashion for the truly talented.”

“Of course you are,” Madame said. “Start the music.”

A choir began to sing something about rain and stars. “Is this the right music?” the host asked.

“Of course it is,” the designer said.

“Right. Carry on,” the host said.   He ran his hand through his hair again and smiled. The lights dimmed, and the first model came out. She sashayed down the catwalk on three-foot stilts, while wearing a pencil skirt that went past her knees. Her wrap-around tunic was tied with complex celtic knots.

“Are those stilts attached to her shoes?” the host asked.

“Of course they are,” Madame said. “Where would the challenge be otherwise? You can’t take the heels off high-heels either.”

“How long does it take to tie those knots?” the host asked.

“It depends on your talent,” Madame said.

More models on stilts came through, each walking down the catwalk as though they were wearing flats. “How much practice did it take for them to learn to walk like that?” the host asked.

“It depends on the model,” Madame said.

“What was the average amount of time?”

“Two months. Practically nothing, really.” Madame chuckled. “Those truly dedicated to fashion could probably master it in an evening.”

Bagpipes started to join the choir. “Does that mean it’s time for your men’s collection?”

“Indeed.”

The first model came out hopping gracefully. He was wearing two neckties that were woven into the lacing of his suit coat. The weaving and knotwork was complex and lovely.

“Why are they hopping like that?” the host asked.

“Because their shoes are connected,” Madame said. “I’ll probably add springs for my next collection.”

“In the spring?” the host asked. “Is that a joke?”

“I never joke about fashion,” Madame said. “That would be irresponsible.”

“But who would want their shoes connected like that? It’s not safe,” the host said.

“Well, if you want to be safe, I’m sure you can find something practical at your local department store,” Madame said.

“Right. What was I thinking?” the host said.

Several more models hopped by. The host ran his hand through his hair. Half of it was lying flat now. He sighed.   “It was another innovative and beautiful collection,” he said.

“I know. I’m a genius,” Madame said.

The models all came out for a last round of applause.   “Madame, would you like to come out and join them?” the host asked.

There was no response.

“Madame?” the host said. The models filed through the doors at the back of the stage.

“Madame?”

The host peeked around the curtain and then pulled it back. There was no one there. “She couldn’t have left without anyone seeing her,” the host said.   “Right?”

Exchanges

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The boss smiled and handed the designs back to Alex. “That is exactly what we were looking for,” he said.

Alex nodded. “Great!   So, I’ll contact Bob and we can start filling out the paperwork.”

The boss shook his head. “I have some one else in mind.”

“Not Bob?” Alex was shocked. “We always work with Bob.”

“Yes, but the new guy says he’ll work for free and provide all the building materials,” the boss said.

Alex frowned. “That sounds too good to be true. What’s the catch?”

The boss laughed. “He’s going to need a lot of training. He’s pretty new to the planet.”

“What do you mean?” Alex asked.

“Just what I said,” the boss said. He pushed the intercom button. “Ella, can you send Webster in?”

“Webster? That’s an unusual name,” Alex said.

“It’s his human name,” the boss said. “For when he’s an exchange student here, learning how to live with humans. He says it’s the author of his favorite earth book. He even has an artificial human suit to wear to blend in with us humans.”

A man came in wearing a black suit with a white scarf tied around his neck and a white powdered wig on his head. “Hello,” he said. “I’m Webster.” He held a hand out and Alex shook it. He held his other hand out and Alex shook it too.

“Hello, Webster,” Alex said. “I’m Alex.   I’m one of the architects in the firm.”

The boss stood up. “Alex, take Webster with you to the Gregson job. Show him the ropes, all right?”

“Okay,” Alex said. “Come with me, Webster. I’ll give you a ride to the site.”

Today they were going to pour the foundation for the Gregson Dental Center.   Webster looked around the large hole dug into the ground and wiggled the metal and wooden framework with his foot.   “So, you fill this with liquid rock, right?” he asked.

“Well, it’s a bit more complicated than that,” Alex said.

“Oh, that’s okay,” Webster said. “I’ve got this.” He pulled out what looked like a little pen and wrote something in the air above the waiting framework.

The framework started filling up with lava. Alex jumped back. The wood burned and the metal melted like it was ice on a hot day. “What did you do?” He asked.

“Provided building materials,” Webster said. “It was part of our agreement.”

“But the lava’s in contact with air. It will cool too quickly to be stable and solid,” Alex said. “We use concrete for building.”

“Concrete?”

Alex sighed. “It’s a mix of gravel and sand and cement and water. I’ll show you, after you get rid of the lava.”

“Oh, you’ll have to wait until it cools and dig it out,” Webster said. “I can’t unmake things. I guess I could make a windstorm or a sinkhole or…”

“Just leave it there,” Alex said. “We’ll deal with it later. Let’s go over to the new supermarket addition. We’re building the supports for the walls.”

They drove across town.   Webster’s face was pressed to the window. “These human eyes can’t see as far as my normal eyes,” he said. “Do you have a telescope?”

“Not with me,” Alex said.

At the construction site, Alex knelt down and patted the foundation.

“This must be concrete,” Webster said.   “Maybe I should take a sample.”

“Leave it be,” Alex said. “I’ll give you a sample of concrete later. For now, we’ll be starting the supports.”

“That’s right,” Webster said. “What are they made out of?”

“Wood,” Alex said. “Here’s a list of the sizes we’ll need.”

“Tree products,” Webster said. “I can do that. I saw tree products all over the office when I was there.”

He wrote in the air, and large support beams made of paper appeared on the ground in front of them. “Almost, but not quite,” Alex said. “This is processed tree product and isn’t as strong as wood. Let’s go to a hardware store and I can let you see the materials we’ll be working with.”

“That sounds like a good idea,” Webster said. “Do they have telescopes?”

“No,” Alex said. “Just building materials and tools.”

“Oh well,” Webster said. “Let’s get going. I’m looking forward to seeing how you preserve the ice blocks you build with. It seems much too warm for them to stay stable.”

“It is,” Alex said. “They don’t build with ice here.”

“Mud?”

“No,” Alex said. “But we do use bricks that are made from baked clay.”

“Oh good,” Webster said. “Let’s go see some of those. I want to send some home to my friends.”

“Sounds great,” Alex said. “Let’s go.”

 

Empty Your Pockets

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“Mom,” Gracie said. “Mom? Mom. MOM.”

“I’m in the kitchen,” Mom said.

“Mooooooooom,” Gracie said as she hurried down the hall.

“Gracie, what’s wrong?” Mom asked. She turned off the faucet and dried her hands.

“My super amazing beautiful glittery rainbow rock is missing!” Gracie said. “It’s gone!” Read More

Unicorn Games

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The chief elders of Atlantis looked over the reports with grim faces. The truce was over. Their enemies would arrive within a week. War was unavoidable, and their little island would not survive it.   “What can we do?” one of the elders asked.

No one answered. The sat and looked at each other. No one had anything to say. And then, glitter fell from nowhere onto the table and a scroll appeared. The chief healer snatched it up. “It’s from the unicorns,” he said. “It’s their secrets to playing hide-and-seek.”

The chief scribe snorted in disdain. “There aren’t any unicorns. They’re a ridiculous myth.”

“Well, something made that scroll appear out of nowhere,” the chief healer said.   “And where else would you find that much gold glitter?”

“If it was really unicorns, there would be rainbows,” the chief scribe said.   “But I don’t see any rainbows.”

Just then, a rainbow shot through the window and knocked him out of his chair.   They heard a whinny of laughter and the sound of fading hoofbeats. “I didn’t know rainbows could do that,” the chief researcher said. “I thought they were made of light and air and water.   Now I have to revisit the idea of rainbow bridges.”

The chief scribe stood up and brushed off his robes. “I didn’t see anything,” he said. “No one saw any unicorns. That’s because they don’t exist.”

The chief healer waved the scroll. “I think we should try this. What do we have to lose?”

The chief scribe snorted again. “Foolishness. We should spend our last hours composing epic poetry. Then our names will live on long after we do. It’s guaranteed immortality! Who’s with me?”

He looked around. Everyone else had gathered around the chief healer and were discussing the scroll.   He stormed out. “Mark my words,” he called over his shoulder, “No one will forget the name Qwerty. My name will live on into the distant future.”

And they were both right. The city of Atlantis disappeared within a day, and was never found again, just like the unicorns. And, people still remember the name Qwerty, but not because of his poetry.

Years later, a poor minstrel was cheated out of his wages by greedy, cruel villagers. Appalled by how easily they lied to him and refused to honor their agreements, he sat outside the town and mourned for their children. “They will become a city of cheats and liars and never know any better,” he said.   “I’d charm them away with my music, but where could I take them?”

And then, glitter fell from nowhere onto the grass beside him and a scroll appeared. He opened it. “It’s the secrets to playing hide-and-seek from the unicorns. Amazing!” the minstrel said.   He turned the scroll over.   “Look, there are directions to Atlantis.   This is my lucky day.”

He rolled the scroll back up and put it in his pack. Then he pulled out his flute and strode back into town.   The town of Hamlin lost all its children that day. Well, all but one. All the others went to stay at Atlantis.

More years later, a flock of birds huddled together on a tiny island far away.   “What will we do? We are disappearing. Too many of us have been eaten by the people coming to our island,” one of the dodos said.

“But what can we do?” another asked. “What do all the other animals do when they start disappearing?”

And then, glitter fell from nowhere onto the sand beside him and a voice began to whisper the secrets to playing hide-and-seek.

The dodos looked at each other in amazement. “That was the unicorns!” one of the birds finally said. “We’ve got to go tell everyone else. It’s our turn to hide!”

 

Charlie’s Room: The Tent

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It was raining. It wasn’t a soft, gentle rain, either. Rain was pouring down in that relentless, driving way that sounded like a flock of woodpeckers was targeting the roof. Charlie looked out the front window and sighed. “It’s not fair,” he said. “We were supposed to go camping today.”

“I’m sorry, Charlie,” Isaac said. “Maybe next weekend?”

“Mom has a meeting,” Charlie said.

“We’ll look at the calendar and see what we can do,” Isaac said.

“Maybe we can watch a movie,” Marianne said.

“But Mom,” Charlie said. “I want to go camping.”

“Maybe we could camp in your room again,” Isaac said.

“All of us?” Charlie asked.

“Sure,” Marianne said.

So they tied ropes from Charlie’s loft bed to the desk and chair and dresser.   Then they arranged blankets and sheets over the top, until the floor was inside one big tent, and Charlie’s door was the door to the tent.

They ate dinner in the kitchen, much to Charlie’s disappointment.   “Let’s not get crumbs or stains on your carpet,” Marianne said.

Then they sat in the dark living room and watched the rain through the window.   When they saw a flash of lightning, they counted together until thunder cracked and rumbled. “Should we tell scary stories?” Isaac asked.

Thunder boomed. Charlie looked nervous. “Maybe we could tell funny stories instead,” Marianne said. “I know a great one. When Charlie was three, he couldn’t reach the paper towels on the counter, so he…”

“Mom!” Charlie said. “That’s not a funny story. That’s an embarrassing story.”

Marianne laughed. “Well, then let me tell you about the time your Dad got lost in the grocery store,” she said.

“Hey!” Isaac said. “Well, maybe it was a little funny.”

“I think it sounds funny,” Charlie said.

They laughed and told stories and finally rolled out their sleeping bags on Charlie’s floor and went to sleep. Isaac woke up hours later. Charlie had somehow turned sideways and was kicking him.

Isaac sat up and considered turning Charlie around.   And then he heard an owl hooting.   He paused and listened. He couldn’t hear the rain. The owl hooted again, and it sounded really close. He looked up. Instead of the nightlight glowing brightly through the tent ceiling, the light seemed dimmer and softer.

He crawled forward and looked out of Charlie’s door and didn’t see the hallway. Instead, there was a forest. Isaac stood up and stepped out of the tent. He looked around. The forest stretched in all directions. The tent didn’t look like blankets and sheets and rope. It was large and round, with a peaked roof like a circus tent.   It had white and gold stripes that glowed in the moonlight.

The moon above was full and the stars were bright.   He couldn’t see any clouds in the sky.   He was looking for constellations he recognized, when some branches snapped behind him and Isaac turned to face a centaur. The centaur was tall, with gray hair. He smiled at Isaac.

“Hello, traveler,” the centaur said. “You’ve come from far away.”

“I have?” Isaac asked.

“Yes, you’ve traveled thousands of years.   Tell me about the future. Is it marvelous?”

“Well, people live longer. And they can communicate and travel much more easily, too,” Isaac said. “There are still a lot of misunderstandings though. And wars and natural disasters and such.”

“That isn’t very surprising. It comes from living in an imperfect world,” the centaur said.   “What are your hopes and dreams, man from the future?”

Isaac glanced back at the tent. “I want my family to be safe and happy. I want to do good and make a difference.”

The centaur smiled. “Then the future can’t be so bad after all. People still hope and dream and love and care. Don’t give up, man from the future.” He waved his hand in a small circle and there was a brilliant flash of light.

When Isaac opened his eyes again, he could see blankets and rope above him. The nightlight shone brightly through the ceiling of the tent. Charlie kicked him in the side and there was a rumble of thunder.   Had it been a dream?  Maybe. Maybe not.  Isaac shifted Charlie around and went back to sleep.